How many quotes, posts and memes do we share and re-post in a day? Inspiring and encouraging. Motivating us to make decisions that reflect the future that we want. Pushing us to think and reevaluate our words, thoughts and actions. But how many times do we dig deep and do that work? Now, more than ever awareness is front and center. We are paying attention to the world around us in ways that we havenā€™t before. We have been faced with all the things in 2020. How are we responding? Are you showing up for yourself?

A few months ago, I found myself in a situation where I could have responded in a number of ways. I could have chosen to question myself and sit in sadness. Or become cynical and angry. Or even be embarrassed. I honestly, had to allow myself a few days to center my thoughts because I didnā€™t feel immediately. I went into solution mode. I eventually felt. Ā Even within those months of adjustments, I had to push through emotions depending on the day. But I made a conscious decision to trust God and not allow my situation to define me. That can be hard to do. As I see it though, choosing not to live fully because something beyond your control has happened is a missed opportunity. So, I chose to learn and grow. I purposefullyā€”kept certain things to myself because I know that I can control me but I canā€™t control others. I couldnā€™t risk being thrown off of my focus because of someone elseā€™s opinion or pressure. Because I am naturally a sharer in many ways my personality guides me to connect with others. I am an empath. I love deep conversation, often that has put me in a position of sharing, and at times over-sharing. Therefore, during this period, I really went inward. I feel stronger, ultimately, and just more spiritually healthy now that Iā€™m on the other side of it. I meditated, prayed and lived without some of the restrictions that I had once defined as life. When you repeatedly do something for so many years, you start to fall in place and not question, accepting and conforming even if itā€™s not completely fulfilling. Unintentionally, many times. Life just happens.

I have been on a journey of intentional self-exploration since 2018 but I was forced to see in this year that I too needed a major change. It happened abruptly, of course. I had prepared myself for this particular ā€œwhat ifā€ and even prayed that if it did happen, ā€œLord, please let it happen likeā€¦ā€.  Indeed, God answered my prayer with a ā€œyesā€ and it will forever be a powerful testimony that I am grateful for. (Iā€™ll share the details of this at a later time.)

When I was faced with uncertainty, I knew that I could not look back and fall into comfort. I wanted to shine in my full self and not find myself in a situation that could diminish all that I am meant to be. This was a chance to take my own advice.  I showed up for myself in ways that I had been showing up for others. Motivating and encouraging, inspiring others to become their bestā€” I take pride in this. However, I didnā€™t realize that I wasnā€™t doing the same for myself in some ways. When it came to myself, I was going through the motions at times.  You know that feeling when, even while making strides in some areas, you subconsciously crave a real shift to push you towards your purpose? A huge shake up to make you choose yourself? Well, that happened for me. This year. Which I am thankful for, because 2020 is the year of ā€œif not now, when?ā€

This is the moment, the season, the year of now. Donā€™t wait to walk in your light. In every moment, donā€™t hesitate to be everything that you are.  Although, I have always lived in authenticity there have been times where I have held back and dimmed my light a little. So, I have intentionally cancelled that. (This is the time where I completely support the cancel.) What it comes down to is simple: We donā€™t know what tomorrow holds, but today. Today, letā€™s show up.

P.S. VOTE. Vote like your life depends on itā€”because it does. Back in 2017, I went to the Womenā€™s March. I woke up early in the morning while it was still dark outside.  Got ready, putting my Angela Davis t-shirt on under my denim long sleeve and tucked my red lipstick into my crossbody. I trekked to the E train to meet my Sis so that we could head to the Port Authority to get on our bus to DC. I showed up for us. I marched because I believe all of our children deserve more. High quality education. Affordable healthcare.  Clean air and water. Safe neighborhoods.  A feeling of safety in their schools. Opportunities to see a world of possibility not limitation. I marched because women deserve respect and the right to decide what is best for their own bodies.  Quality healthcare. Equal pay. I marched because the America that I love is diverse and beautiful and filled with hope. I marched because I believe that love always wins. AND THIS IS WHY I VOTE. https://www.whenweallvote.org/

Xo,

Tiffany ReneƩ

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Tiffany ReneĆ© is a writer, poet and activist based in New York. She is a free spirit who loves to truly connect with others.Ā She believes that life gives us opportunities toĀ learn and grow dailyĀ if we are open to see the beauty in the expansion. Family time, deep conversation, wine, cooking, music, laughter and travel are a few of her favorite things. Sheā€™s a soulfulĀ dreamer from the Midwest who has always been drawn to the city lights and the possibilities that exist in choosing ā€œmoreā€ of what allows you to live a life that you love.

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