So here we are at Memorial Day weekend. The official kickoff of summer. Can we call this the “summer of pandemic”? We also learned this past week that Cameron’s summer camp is canceled. It’s going to be one very long long long summer.

So my wife and I are both working from home. Homeschooling Cameron and watching over a rambunctious three-year-old at home every day. We also have three fish tanks, a cat, so what the fuck, why not adopt a two-month-old puppy…. we don’t have enough stress already in our lives.

Lorelei and I both grew up in homes without dogs, so we were pilgrims in an unholy land.

We looked at every shelter in the area. But we quickly learned that many other families had decided that the stay at home order was also a great time to adopt.  This is also very concerning because I wonder what is going to happen once kids eventually go back to school in the fall, and people go back to work. Are they going to give these dogs back?

We finally found a great puppy to adopt four weeks ago. I called the wonderful people at Pet Pantry (thank you, Ari Jacobson) and they set up all of the items that we would need to get started.

We had to pick the puppy up, two hours from our house. The boys were so excited on the ride up. Lorelei was so excited that she actually behaved in the car the whole way there. The ride home she did not.

The puppy took an immediate liking to the boys and Lorelei. She, of course, loves me because I feed her. We debated about names on the way home. Since my wife loves golf so much we decided on Augusta. Cameron calls her pup pup and Brady calls her dog.

This was going to be a challenge for us. We knew we would have time for the young puppy, but training her and adapting to getting up at all hours of the night to walk her, was going to be a challenge. I did something very smart. I made Lorelei do all of this….

I was worried that the house was going to get messy and smelly. I may have mentioned it many times before but after much thought, I’m admitting it once again: I’m a neat freak.

I’ll admit the transition has had a few bumps in the road. At first, she was not eating. So I asked my only friend in this world, Google, what was safe to feed a puppy. So, I started cooking for a dog.

This is what my life has become…. cooking for a dog.

The first time I fed her, she ate the bowl in like two minutes flat. Never lifted her head up. So that problem was quickly solved.

That statement brings us to my next problem. After she ate it, I looked at my wife and said “if there was a problem yo I’ll solve it…”, and now I’ve been humming that fuckin song for weeks. The other song that has been stuck in my head lately has been “Bust a move”.

Sorry, got off the subject. And now, I’ll be singing that song for another week.

The biggest problem that we have been facing is getting her to tell us when she has to go to the bathroom. She hits the wee wee pads about 80% of the time. She almost is beating me with how often I can hit the toilet seat… but honestly she gives you no warning. Plus, it’s like 5 minutes after she eats. What is this dog part goose???

This is the part that has freaked the living neat freak out of me. I feel like the house is always a little messier and smellier. Plus, now we have her toys and chewed up rawhide sticks all over the place.

But once you have kids, you have been cleaning up poop and toys many times before, so it’s no big deal.

But the days of some civility in this house are now completely out the window. No more giving the kids the iPad for two hours as I try to get some work done. No more going to bed at 8:30 and binge-watching Netflix. Now, we need to take the puppy out. And she is letting her presence be known at all times.

Native New Yorker, now living in Connecticut. Husband, and father of two amazing boys. Kidney transplant recipient, and a big supporter of organ donation #donatelife. Mortgage banker, but not by choice. In my free time, I enjoy golf, reading (especially presidential biographies), and finding that hole in the wall restaurant that has great food.

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